I thought I would continue my Creative Consequences stream of thought. I thought I should also note that these are just what I said – Creative Consequences – NOT punishments. If you have signed up to work with my pal Amy McCready at Positive Parenting Solutions, then you know that consequences are the most natural way to help children learn. Disclaimer done. And so on we go …
Lately, we have had one main problem with each child and I got fed up. Big time.
OFFENSE – the 9yo rarely puts something where it actually belongs
CONSEQUENCE – put the item(s) away 5 times over … for each item
LIFE LESSON – Do it right the first time! Take your time to do it right the first time and you won’t need to spend so much time re-doing it.
EXAMPLE: All the playing cards but one got put away during family clean-up time. When she discovered the one left out, she put it on the sofa. Since she had already been warned of the consequence of not putting things where they belong, she had to do the following –
- Pick up card. Open ottoman. Put card in box. Close ottoman.
- Open ottoman. Pull card out of box. Close ottoman. Put card back on sofa.
- Repeat steps 1 and 2 until card has been appropriately put away 5 times.
OFFENSE – the 2yo has taken to saying “pee” and “poo” – a lot (It’s one thing to say you have to go, this is another story.)
CONSEQUENCE – (1) ignore it – don’t fuel the attention-seeking; (2) she has to hold her tongue for 10 seconds
LIFE LESSON – Some things aren’t appropriate to say (no matter what), we have to learn to “hold” our tongue a lot in life.
EXAMPLE: The little one was told immediately upon hearing “Pee on you!” that those things aren’t nice to say and they sound nasty. Then, she was told if she said it again she would have to hold her tongue, and I showed what I meant. Then follow through. If she’s too stubborn to hold her own tongue, I will hold it for her (firmly, but gently).
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